WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE...

...Or I will wash your mouth out with a mixture of seaweed, bonito flakes, sesame seeds, wasabi crumbles and other asian stuff. Sprinkle it all over me!

NOT DISHWASHER SAFE

Found a new coffee cup at my secret antique spot. Shhhhhh

BEAN FLICKER

This delightful lunch came together because it was literally the only 4 things I had left in the Clydesdale Kitchen.

Sweet Chilli grilled Chicken, Green beans w/ toasted almonds, Broccoli & Cheddar rice.

PLUMPERS

The squirrels that call my avocado tree home, are the biggest on the block. They stay nice and husky with an endless supply of healthy fat. I come out to my yard daily to find their left overs on the branch. They better start eating the whole avocado if they don't want a skewers up their lil buttholes.

WE BE CLUBBIN'

Took this whole thing down before I played 18 holes. Afterward I felt like 50 Cent punched me in my lower intestine.

FAUX FRENCH FOO

The glowing turd on my plate is tofu scramble. This more important than me vegan today showed up to work at 7:30 am eating Trader Joes Soy Chikin Nuggets. Don't know why this bothered me so much, I feel like doing this is along the lines of turning gay just to get laid alot?

SUNSET SANDWICH

Two bites is all it took for someone to toss their bread sandwich to the ground. A stroll down Sunset blvd is never dull.

HEALTHY SUCKS

The Art Director on set was vegan. So lunch was a healthy and boring one. I would look at him and secretly flip him off in my mind and call him names like, 'Boner Breath'.

MUSCLE PIE